This is actually my first ever submission and subsequent rejection to McSweeney’s, dating way back to ye olden January aught seven. I’ve been meaning to post this for awhile, seeing as this blog is nothing else if not a compendium of failure:
Words That Have Been Edited Out of My News Stories Because, Even
Though The Average Age of Our Readership is 60, Journalists Must Write
at a Sixth Grade Level, and Other Reasons the Newspaper Industry Is In
Decline
Shrapnel
Sacrosanct
Anathema
Beastly
Tantamount
Words that Have Inexplicably Not Been Edited Out of My Stories
Douchebaggery
Fiduciary solvency
Kraken
Inverted Soapbox 