Sit back down, have a beer, and feel sorry for art

hootieVia Jeff Vrabel from Island Packet/The Guide staff reports, also starring Other Tim and Justin

Island Packet — Although it’s been more than a decade since Hootie and the Blowfish’s “Cracked Rear View” brought them national fame, the band members still turn heads in South Carolina. And their latest project is a partnership with the Columbia City Ballet for a performance telling the story of the group’s formative years using dance, dialogue and live music. No, really.  No, really.

But odd as it may sound, the tickets are selling. “We’ve always felt like maybe South 
Carolina’s best export and we’ve always tried to carry that with some pride,” said drummer Jim “Soni” Sonefeld told the Associated Press this week. There are also these plentiful …

Reasons To See The Hootie and the Blowfish Ballet

  • Should be way more successful than “Edwin McCain’s Nutcracker.”
  • The company will include lone a black dancer surrounded by lots of white people.
  • Weird cameo by Dan Marino.
  • Extended sequence lifted directly from the Bob Dylan Ballet.
  • It’s not often you see so many people at a ballet with baseball caps on backwards.
  • Supporting it also will finally give light to other long-awaited representations of white ‘90s culture, including “Friends: The Musical,” “Starbucks LIVE!” and “Watching VH1 On Ice.”
  • Mikhail Baryshnikov performing the “Dance of the Sugar-Plum Blowfish.”

    And the rest of the uncensored list:

  • It’s finally the answer to the question: what dances on tip toes and sucks?
  • It contains a preview of the Deep Blue Something opera
  • Band has desperately been trying to spread “Hooter and the Blowjob” jokes to two art forms
  • Things that will make you cry:  the Dolphins; poorly executed pirouettes

One response to “Sit back down, have a beer, and feel sorry for art

  1. Cracked Rearview was my shit.

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