Tag Archives: vegetarians

Didja know…

…Capt. Vegetable was from New Jersey? This whole time!

(via Matt Hitchens)

For all the hate New Jersey gets, I’ll take Garden State tomatoes at the farmer’s market over other veggies any day.

I like the kid Eddie who eats spaghetti is no less culpable for being unhealthy than the kid who eats candy. Is this why we raised a generation of carb-obsessed adults?

“Gee Capt. Vegetable, this is the best thing to come along since meatballs!”

A decade without meat

Mr. Burns on gelatin dish: "It's made of hooves, you know."

eat my vest

One of the things I’m happy to say most cleanly disaffiliates me from whatever we’re calling hipster culture these days is a fairly long and dedicated streak of vegetarianism. While going veg used to be the counter-culture thing to do, eating meat is really in right now for the fauxhemian, brobo, slackeratti and urban hippie set. And not just eating meat, but getting fetishistic about it, as apparent in these boutique slaughtering classes that some carnivores claim cleans their conscience (and some vegetarians think resembles an Eli Roth movie), the hunt for obscure deli meats (really, gang? You ate zebra before all your friends. Great, you win), and, uh, caveman chic.

And then there are all these trendy spots dedicated to the consumption of creature in some form that have opened in Williamsburg recently, like The Meat Hook, Pies and Thighs, Fatty ‘Cue, and so forth, plus the rise of the word “flexitarian,” which I cannot stress to you enough how many ways that’s not a real thing.

As Flavorwire wrote last week in their guide to throwing a Hipster BBQ:

It used to be that hipsters were vegetarians or vegans or macrobiotic or followed other strange, eco-/animal-friendly diet. But these days, most agree that eating cow and pig is the best way to show you’re in touch with the real America. You know, farms and tractor pulls and such. Designer barbecue spots and boutique butcher shops are popping up in hipster meccas all over the country. And if you still insist on giving a shit about sustainability, “free-range” and “local” is the new meat-free.

I’ve also seen a few friends and associates give up the veg life, some saying they’re doing so because they’re tired of missing out on all the dining options in this great city (though I am happy to say we’ve added a few converts to the ranks recently).

Despite the name of this blogspace, this author doesn’t actually ever get up on much of a soapbox about things, and he won’t bore you by starting now. Suffice it to say I’m generally cool with what you eat as long as you’re conscious of where it’s coming from, and that place isn’t some gruesome foie-gras or veal-cutlet factory. I do think if you’re a carnivore you should be able to, kill, flay and cook a pig yourself without getting squeamish (commit or quit folks). If you eat McDonald’s more than once a week, there’s a good chance I’m making fun of you when you’re not around (as much for health reasons as for ethical ones). If your restaurant can’t offer at least one decent vegetarian option (not the default pasta or default salad, or something off-menu you have to special request) then you’re sorta uncool (looking at you, Hilton Head). You should probably also be aware of the fuel consumption required by the meat industry too, come to think of it, especially considering recent events.

So it was this month 10 years ago that I formally gave up meat, after many years of hemming and hawing and rationalizing myself out of it in high school. In honor of spending more than a third of my years sans-hamburger, I’m going big V for the month.

Continue reading

NEW CHIPOTLE BURRITO and where to get it

In probably the most food-consciously satisfying news to come along since it was discovered that Bacos are 100 percent vegan, PETA2 (PETA’s tubular teen branch) announced last week it has named Chipotle as the Best Fast Food Chain.

Chipotle won the Libby Award (short for “liberation”) for its dedication to sustainable farm practices, commitment to serving only humanely raised meats, and extremely veg- and vegan-friendly menu. This is fantastic news because: A) Chipotle is unfailingly delicious and satisfying, so much so that I (and others) have been known to order two burritos at once with the intention of saving one for dinner, only to take both to the head in under an hour; and B) Our love of it is doubly justified when you can actually feel decent about the company and products you are supporting, with their damn ethics and everything. The PETA2 press release dropped some news about a new roasted vegetable, all-vegan burrito the company is testing out.

The restaurant also recently introduced a vegan “Garden Blend” burrito, which features vegan chicken, grains, and marinated vegetables and is available at select locations in New York City and Washington, D.C.

So, seeing as Inverted Soapbox has been dabbling in dairy reduction of late, we decided to do some reporting to find out where to find this neorrito. Answer, via Shannon Kyllo, Chipotle marketing consultant:

Currently, we are just testing Garden Blend at our DuPont Circle location in Washington D.C. and our Chelsea West location in New York. Those are the only two locations we are testing this in right now, but we hope all goes well so we may offer it in all of our restaurants.

Say it with me now: NEW CHIPOTLE BURRITO. Remember in The Wizard where they unveil A NEW GAME!! and it’s Super Mario 3? Excitement is parallel. Continue reading

PETA’s ad banned; Cash4gold still OK

Are you kidding me? This is the PETA ad NBC banned from the Superbowl:

The NSFW reasons why:

  • licking pumpkin
  • touching her breast with her hand while eating broccoli
  • pumpkin from behind between legs
  • rubbing pelvic region with pumpkin
  • screwing herself with broccoli (fuzzy)
  • asparagus on her lap appearing as if it is ready to be inserted into vagina
  • licking eggplant
  • rubbing asparagus on breast

Read the full letter here (pdf)

To summarize the list of Superbowl standards:

Eating veggies and having great sex*: unacceptable

Eating hamburgers and drinking beer that leads to fat, bloaty sex: acceptable

(seriously, this McDonald’s one is less racy, but still the same thing, implying that a waft of fragrant cheese and meat will save your boring, loveless marriage)

Erectile dysfunction ad full of innuendo: fine

.05 seconds of a naked breast that may have helped some poor old man’s E.D.: not fine

Two hours of 22 men running over each other and gloating about it: sports!

30 seconds of political advocacy: that’s not sports!


next: FlashyBaggyPants4Gold.com

anthropomorphic frogs: OK

anthropomorphic MC Hammer: also OK, apparently.

* Hey, and guess what- that ad?. It happens to be true. Believe it.